Post by ♥Blissfullove♥ on Jun 23, 2015 0:15:35 GMT -5
A vampire. One simple word and my life was changed completely. Edward Cullen, the mysterious Edward Cullen was a vampire. Of course my first boyfriend would be a vampire. Couldn’t I have had a player? Or maybe a serial killer. At least something someone would believe, but no I decided I wanted to have feelings for a vampire. Not just any vampire, a vampire who apparently watched me in my sleep, was controlling, and wanted to drink me dry.
Here I was sitting in my violet painted room with only the light on my desk lighting the room just enough so I could see my keyboard. It was late, midnight to be exact. I couldn’t sleep and I made Edward go home already since he was trying to get into my room. Google Docs was the only tab open on my screen and not a single word typed in yet. How do I start it? How was I going to give it to him? Maybe Alice would see what I am doing and tell him or maybe she would give it to him for me. Maybe they will leave after I tell Edward, I can’t leave; I just got here and it would break my father's heart.
I wasn’t completely sure what I felt for Edward. I felt like I needed to be in his arms one second, but the next, I wanted to be a thousand miles away from him. He creeped me out, yet made me safe. I didn’t like this feeling, it was unknown and I was far from comfortable with it. One thing I was sure of, I didn’t want to be in a relationship with him yet, and I didn’t have the confidence to tell him in person. He dazzled me whenever we spoke and I seemed to forget everything when I was with him. It scared me; was this how a relationship was supposed to be? All these books I read, with the romance, they make it sound like it's so great and you know automatically, but I don’t.
‘Here goes nothing,’ I think. My fingers start to hit one key after the other, and before I know it my letter is finished.
“Dear Edward,
I hate to write this in a letter, but it's what I am going to do. I can’t talk to you without being dazzled. But, at the same time, I can’t be in the same building with you without feeling as if I have a stalker.
Edward, I know it is not your fault that you are a vampire, but I can’t be in a relationship with you. You scare me, yet you make me feel safe. I can’t look at you without worrying if you are going to bite my neck and suck me dry. I’m not the one for you Edward and you aren’t the one for me. You say my blood calls to you and that's the reason you want to be with me. You don’t want me for my quirks. Would you be there for my best and worst days? What happens if I accidentally cut myself while cutting myself an apple? I’m clumsy, every day something happens to me. We can’t have a relationship Edward.
I’m a human a small fragile human who wants kids, wants a life. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and make breakfast for my family my HUSBAND. I don’t want my husband to lay awake as I sleep peacefully I want him to cuddle me as we both sleep peacefully. Edward, if we continue our relationship we will end up as Romeo and Juliet. One of us will eventually die and then the other will kill themselves because we have fallen so deep in love. It’s a pain that I want to avoid. I don’t want to be a vampire because I enjoy the little things that are involved with being a human.
Please don’t come to my house at night when I am sleeping, and please don’t stalk me to see what I am doing. Please, let me live my human life the way I was living it before.
I’m sorry Edward,
Bella.”
Before I can talk myself into deleting it I press print and watch as ink destroys the once perfect white paper. Once it prints I fold it three times and stick it into an envelope. Edward. Written on the front of it. I stick it into my backpack and lay on top of my bed feeling like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.
When I wake in the morning I refuse to think about what I will be doing in less than an hour. I get to school just in time as Edwards car pulls into the parking lot. Alice gets out first and looks at me and gives me a sad smile. I look away from her and see Edward coming to me.
“Hey love, how did you sleep?” He wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head.
“Edward.” I murmur and shrug him off and take a step back.
“This is for you. Don’t read it till you get into first period please.” I hand him the envelope and he takes it looking at me confused.
“I have to go though, I have a doctors appointment at eight thirty.” He was still staring at me like I had grown three heads and he hadn’t even opened it yet.
“Is this why Alice has been replaying Legally Blonde in her head all night?” He questions taking a step forward.
“No I don’t know why she is doing that.” The bell rings and I want to thank whoever rung it because Edward stepped away.
“Will you be coming back to school?”
“Probably.” I state and climb back into my truck.
He just nods and walks away. Starting my truck I drive right past the hospital and into the safe territory of La Push where I know he can’t cross. I send my dad a quick text to say I wasn’t feeling well so I stayed home, and now I wait. I wait until Edward leaves or I wait until my dad asks where I am. Which ever comes first. Till then I go to the beach and sit on the cold sand and read read the only book I had. Romeo and Juliet.
Here I was sitting in my violet painted room with only the light on my desk lighting the room just enough so I could see my keyboard. It was late, midnight to be exact. I couldn’t sleep and I made Edward go home already since he was trying to get into my room. Google Docs was the only tab open on my screen and not a single word typed in yet. How do I start it? How was I going to give it to him? Maybe Alice would see what I am doing and tell him or maybe she would give it to him for me. Maybe they will leave after I tell Edward, I can’t leave; I just got here and it would break my father's heart.
I wasn’t completely sure what I felt for Edward. I felt like I needed to be in his arms one second, but the next, I wanted to be a thousand miles away from him. He creeped me out, yet made me safe. I didn’t like this feeling, it was unknown and I was far from comfortable with it. One thing I was sure of, I didn’t want to be in a relationship with him yet, and I didn’t have the confidence to tell him in person. He dazzled me whenever we spoke and I seemed to forget everything when I was with him. It scared me; was this how a relationship was supposed to be? All these books I read, with the romance, they make it sound like it's so great and you know automatically, but I don’t.
‘Here goes nothing,’ I think. My fingers start to hit one key after the other, and before I know it my letter is finished.
“Dear Edward,
I hate to write this in a letter, but it's what I am going to do. I can’t talk to you without being dazzled. But, at the same time, I can’t be in the same building with you without feeling as if I have a stalker.
Edward, I know it is not your fault that you are a vampire, but I can’t be in a relationship with you. You scare me, yet you make me feel safe. I can’t look at you without worrying if you are going to bite my neck and suck me dry. I’m not the one for you Edward and you aren’t the one for me. You say my blood calls to you and that's the reason you want to be with me. You don’t want me for my quirks. Would you be there for my best and worst days? What happens if I accidentally cut myself while cutting myself an apple? I’m clumsy, every day something happens to me. We can’t have a relationship Edward.
I’m a human a small fragile human who wants kids, wants a life. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and make breakfast for my family my HUSBAND. I don’t want my husband to lay awake as I sleep peacefully I want him to cuddle me as we both sleep peacefully. Edward, if we continue our relationship we will end up as Romeo and Juliet. One of us will eventually die and then the other will kill themselves because we have fallen so deep in love. It’s a pain that I want to avoid. I don’t want to be a vampire because I enjoy the little things that are involved with being a human.
Please don’t come to my house at night when I am sleeping, and please don’t stalk me to see what I am doing. Please, let me live my human life the way I was living it before.
I’m sorry Edward,
Bella.”
Before I can talk myself into deleting it I press print and watch as ink destroys the once perfect white paper. Once it prints I fold it three times and stick it into an envelope. Edward. Written on the front of it. I stick it into my backpack and lay on top of my bed feeling like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.
When I wake in the morning I refuse to think about what I will be doing in less than an hour. I get to school just in time as Edwards car pulls into the parking lot. Alice gets out first and looks at me and gives me a sad smile. I look away from her and see Edward coming to me.
“Hey love, how did you sleep?” He wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head.
“Edward.” I murmur and shrug him off and take a step back.
“This is for you. Don’t read it till you get into first period please.” I hand him the envelope and he takes it looking at me confused.
“I have to go though, I have a doctors appointment at eight thirty.” He was still staring at me like I had grown three heads and he hadn’t even opened it yet.
“Is this why Alice has been replaying Legally Blonde in her head all night?” He questions taking a step forward.
“No I don’t know why she is doing that.” The bell rings and I want to thank whoever rung it because Edward stepped away.
“Will you be coming back to school?”
“Probably.” I state and climb back into my truck.
He just nods and walks away. Starting my truck I drive right past the hospital and into the safe territory of La Push where I know he can’t cross. I send my dad a quick text to say I wasn’t feeling well so I stayed home, and now I wait. I wait until Edward leaves or I wait until my dad asks where I am. Which ever comes first. Till then I go to the beach and sit on the cold sand and read read the only book I had. Romeo and Juliet.
